I think pg also wrote an essay about a mental model that I find interesting: When in doubt, it's probably not about you.
There are many events that we usually think are related to us, but actually aren't, like your boss or customer being angry is in most cases not about you but something else.
I have looked through a lot of pg's essays but didn't find it. He probably removed it just that I can't find it (/example).
When shop personel is not friendly, we tend to think that that person is not a friendly person, as a character trait. When I'm not friendly in the same situation, it's because I didn't get enough sleep, or because I had a fight with my girlfriend that morning. So in my case it's circumstantial, temporary, not my fault, in the other person's case it's the person's fault and permanent.
What you describe is our inner voice doing the same thing. (This is my personal explanation!)
There are many events that we usually think are related to us, but actually aren't, like your boss or customer being angry is in most cases not about you but something else.
I have looked through a lot of pg's essays but didn't find it. He probably removed it just that I can't find it (/example).
If someone else finds it, please link.