>While I sometimes understand the bemoaning of top engineers spending time on trivial apps, sometimes those apps aren't as trivial as you would think when you consider how they positively impact loneliness.
Absolutely not. Abstracting a layer of communication, shedding it of any humanity, and lazily pasting over emotion with emoji, is hardly a 'cure' for loneliness. If anything it makes you feel more lonely.
Some Silicon Valley dipshit with a Macbook isn't going to solve loneliness with an app. Sometimes I wish Zuck just had a girlfriend who would have told him FB was a stupid idea and we would have never found ourselves 'here'.
I draw the line in 'social tech bullshit' at the phone call, at least I can hear the vocal inflections. Anything below phone call like texting is used strictly to meet up.
I strongly disagree. Personally, I found text based communications really beneficial while getting through difficult bouts of loneliness in my life. Moments where loniness and anxiety fought over which could make me more miserable.
Would hanging out with someone in person have been a better cure for that loneliness? Sure, but I didn't have anyone and was too stressed out to make finding a group setting worthwhile.
I certainly have moments when I unrealistically dream that I'd never had the issues that I do. I say to myself 'you know all that bullshit stress you had? Instead of trying to cure it through technology you should have just gone out and done it that way.' In those moments I try to remember what it was really like, getting through hard times. I always accept that I wasn't in a position to do that yet.
There isn't one app that ever 'solved' loneliness, and some of those that tried didn't work for me. Facebook still makes me feel anxious and judged by others, for example. But I speak with friends for whom Facebook is a pleasure to use.
I'm glad there are a ton of engineers focusing their time on the trivial task of helping solve loneliness. They certainly made apps and programs and protocols that have helped me. And the more I talk to other people about it, the more people I find have been helped through technology.
Certain apps and strategies for fighting loneliness won't work for everyone, and acknowledging what doesn't work for you is great. But I'd never wish for a time when there weren't people out there trying.
I just moved into a suburban neighborhood. On the surface, in real life, this place seems utterly sterile and devoid of life. But, of course, it is actually filled with life. The design of suburban American neighborhoods make it incredibly difficult to connect people who live just down the street from you.
But I signed up for Nextdoor and there is tons of connection happening between neighbors. There are the obligatory complaints about homeless, but people are also swapping goods, hiring each other, warning about burglars, etc. I have a hard time imagining how all of this happens in a place like this without a social network.
>I have a hard time imagining how all of this happens in a place like this without a social network.
It's customary, when you move in, to knock on your immediate neighbor's doors and introduce yourself. The full-blown cheesy 1950s housewife thing to do is offer homemade baked goods to whoever just moved in. My dad frequently borrowed and lent woodworking tools with the neighbor on one side, and I walked a dog after school for the neighbor on the other side. We'd have each other over for dinner occasionally. We chat over the fences while letting our dogs out or walking to our garages. We run into other families we know at the parks.
Entertaining other families in your home is a big deal in suburbia. Everyone has the space for it, and most families put a great deal of money and effort into making that space welcoming and impressive for guests.
Beyond that, most social life revolves around children: parents who pick their kids up from school (mixture of on foot and in cars) stand around and chat while waiting for their kids to be released. They invite each other over for dinner, form book clubs and knitting circles, converse while picking up and dropping off children from playdates, on the sidelines at youth sports, in the auditorium lobby before school performances and PTA meetings, etc.
You won't see too many people interacting in the street or front yard in suburbia, and little more than dog walkers or pre-driving-age children on the sidewalk. But anytime you see a bunch of street-parked cars on a street where everyone has a garage, that's a dinner party. Smoke rising from a backyard, that's a BBQ or fire pit in use. Bicycles on the lawn, kids meeting at a friend's house.
Suburbia can be full of life, it's just not immediately visible.
I signed up and promptly got banned from Nextdoor.com for calling people NIMBYs. They were vigorously arguing against the town installing a stop sign at an intersection where 2 kids got hit because "stop signs = increased urbanization!!"
Absolutely not. Abstracting a layer of communication, shedding it of any humanity, and lazily pasting over emotion with emoji, is hardly a 'cure' for loneliness. If anything it makes you feel more lonely.
Some Silicon Valley dipshit with a Macbook isn't going to solve loneliness with an app. Sometimes I wish Zuck just had a girlfriend who would have told him FB was a stupid idea and we would have never found ourselves 'here'.
I draw the line in 'social tech bullshit' at the phone call, at least I can hear the vocal inflections. Anything below phone call like texting is used strictly to meet up.