These two scripts seem to have found good workarounds for my current ad-blocker's attempts:

https://js.washingtonpost.com/wp-stat/rum/wprum.min.js

https://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-stat/ad/zeus/wp-ad.min.js

Looking at the output from the browser's console log on this page has me feeling like advertisers and analytics are a pretty gropey bunch. No means no, stop trying to touch my local storage!