I live 60 miles or so south of Seattle. I pay ~300$ more in rent for a 3 bedroom house with a fenced in yard and a garage than I did in Kansas City for a 800 sq foot condo. I'm also not a software developer(who would make more than I do). A house would cost me more, but as a young renter with a wife(who also makes 20k more than she did in KC/MI) we are able to pay off our debt obligations(and save) much faster here than we were in the midwest(I wish like you that I hadn't gone to college, but it's too late)...and I still get to enjoy all of the things that only location can get you. Heck I just went for a jog on the Puget Sound with my dogs 15 minutes ago. You might say my commute is bad, which it is, but thankfully due to the nature of Seattle traffic, many Seattle employers- mine included- have pretty flexible office hours and remote work arrangements.

I'm not trying to convince you that the midwest sucks or whatever, but that there are options out here if you want to work in coastal job markets without the cost of living. That said, nobody move here, the weather is awful and the food is bad.