You're confusing totalitarian and authoritarian.

> Totalitarianism is a political system or a form of government that prohibits opposition parties, restricts individual opposition to the state and its claims, and exercises an extremely high degree of control over public and private life. It is regarded as the most extreme and complete form of authoritarianism.

I guess, but I think I'm not the only one. I think most people who scream 'totalitarian!' do the same.

Yes, people often speak and vote without knowing what they're talking about.