every time I think about walking into these kinds of conversations ... I realize that I would much rather not have mud on my shoes

There's a concept in anthropology called the paradox of the periphery, where people who are farther from their origin / homeland tend to get statistically more religious or extreme in their relation to that homeland....

I feel like that applies to people who are farther from the issue in the whole israel situation. everyone living or from there tends to mention nuance and complexity and everyone farther away just calls it an "obvious" issue with simple solutions.

It's the Israelis who tend to say it's complex. The Palestinians don't

It is an obvious issue with simple solutions! Problem: disputed territory (I mean, duh). Solution: allocate the territory.

Of course, it gets a bit harder if you restrict yourself to ethical, viable solutions, but it can't be that hard. https://xkcd.com/793/

Also relevant: https://xkcd.com/787/

No of course not. Do you agree that the Palestinians who were expelled from what is now Israel should have a right to return?