As someone in my first real realtionship of 5+ years[0] with someone I love more than I could ever have imagined, this hits pretty hard...
I know it's a bit cliche and cringe to say, but my partner really did become my best friend. If I feel bad, the first thing I search for is being close and talking to them. We understand and support each other completely and do random things together, like described in the letter.
We'll move in together in about a year, loosing them would probably rock me really hard and I currently can't imagine who I'd use as emotional support, as the person in question would be gone.
May we happily be together for a long time <3
[0] only realized now that i've been with them for almost all of my adult life (yes, not that old).
It's an almost universal feeling, "I can't imagine who I'd use as emotional support", but if you end things I promise that you will find someone again. Not a replacement, but not a knockoff either, just different.
You used an interesting view of "practical" :) Deep connection is not just some bonus, I think, but in fact the main practical thing about a relationship.
So I share your concern, but even so I'm not that worried. The deeper a connection you've been able to forge in the past, the better your chances of forging another deep connection.
If having had a deep connection happened because you are in general someone easily capable of deep connection, it would be indeed easier to connect deeply again.
But if having a deep connection happened despite you not being such a person, but, e.g., because the person you lost had an equally rare disposition as you, or you lived through special circumstances that bonded you more deeply, it's probably harder to replicate this.
Yeah, it's not that i fear that i'll be alone forever, i just believe that our connection is very special and strong as we came together as young adults and are now in our mid-twenties, so we kind of bonded and matured together through the pandemic, starting new jobs, getting degrees, going on vacations etc. we've experienced so much together that it'll take quite some time to get to know another person to the same level. And we don't even live together at the moment...
In all these years i can't think of a single fight or long-winded argument, if you exclude angryness caused by dehydration or hunger during stressful situations. we've got different skills and personality traits which add up. we've got the same idea on what makes for a comfortable evening or weekend. etc.
TL;DR - we're just a very good match. Of course there are aspects where we could match better, but i can only think of one or two small things.
This is not cringe at all IMO. It is the best thing that happened to me by far as well. Having someone to care about each other, feeling love and especially pure trust is really really priceless.
I know it's a bit cliche and cringe to say, but my partner really did become my best friend. If I feel bad, the first thing I search for is being close and talking to them. We understand and support each other completely and do random things together, like described in the letter.
We'll move in together in about a year, loosing them would probably rock me really hard and I currently can't imagine who I'd use as emotional support, as the person in question would be gone.
May we happily be together for a long time <3
[0] only realized now that i've been with them for almost all of my adult life (yes, not that old).