Are status rules really so simple? Can it not also sometimes raise status to be accommodating, because it shows you can afford it? Of course it would all depend on the circumstances...
I struggle with that on the sidewalk. I tend to move out of the way to let people pass, because it seems more elegant to me, and often I am fitter than the approaching person. Should I really be bulldozing onwards just to assert my status?
What about the gift economy, where the people giving the most gifts has the highest status (examples: open source, science, feasts in archaic societies).
Status games are very interesting. Some of the best people at manipulating status are kiosk sellers.
"As he was rising from obscurity in Philadelphia and wanted the approval of some important man, Franklin would often maneuver that man into doing Franklin some unimportant favor, like lending Franklin a book. Thereafter, the man would admire and trust Franklin more because a nonadmired and nontrusted Franklin would be inconsistent with the appraisal implicit in lending Franklin the book."
This is a great point. One of the best things you can do to quickly build a friendship is ask for a small favor. Borrowing a book or asking for advice are good examples. I think this only works when the cost to the favor-giver is small and the value for the favor-receiver is large.
I love it when I can save someone 4 hours with a few minutes of effort. It feels great and triggers "warm fuzzies." That's why posting on sites like Stack Overflow or Quora is so addictive. But if someone asks me to spend two hours on something that would take them the same amount of time, it feels more like an obligation.
No. You can study this for years and still be mystified. I don't think anyone has figured all of it out.
Can it not also sometimes raise status to be accommodating, because it shows you can afford it?
Generosity is different from being accommodating. You have to have a mission and purpose and not let it slide for trivialities. Generosity means you help people out, but on your terms. You do things for them because it is genuinely good for them. Accommodating means you drop your own needs and wants to do their chores. Doing someone else's low-yield work does not (in general) make you attractive. Of course, there are exceptions.
Should I really be bulldozing onwards just to assert my status?
No. That would be an extremely low-status move. "Asserting" high status by being a dick means you don't have it.
What about the gift economy, where the people giving the most gifts has the highest status (examples: open source, science, feasts in archaic societies)
I struggle with that on the sidewalk. I tend to move out of the way to let people pass, because it seems more elegant to me, and often I am fitter than the approaching person. Should I really be bulldozing onwards just to assert my status?
What about the gift economy, where the people giving the most gifts has the highest status (examples: open source, science, feasts in archaic societies).